Being Feminine

For some time, I have found my thoughts often turning to the concept of femininity. Femininity, not feminism. I am already a rather headstrong feminist, in that I believe in equal rights and opportunities, as well as equal standards and regard between the sexes. The trouble is the latter part seems to somewhat collide with popular perceptions of femininity.

What does it mean to be feminine? I have good reason to ask, and good authority to answer, since I was labelled a "non-female" by a good number of people (men, actually) for quite some time, for different reasons. What was different about me, that people thought I wasn't feminine? 

I was a tomboy for quite some time. A very long time, in fact. I always wore jeans and t-shirts, and they were the baggy, loose kind, that guys usually wear. I never wore makeup or jewelry; never bothered with my hair except for keeping it clean and tightly tied up, away from my face; never worried about getting rid of acne; never giggled with a group of girls, talking about boys or movies; never went for any intense grooming sessions; never displayed those typical gestures or mannerisms that most "feminine" girls seem to have. And then there was the matter of attitude too. Apparently I simply didn't "behave" like a girl, whatever that is supposed to mean. And several times, people advised me with earnest and good intentions to change all that!

Things did change gradually. My tastes in clothes changed a little; I still wear only t-shirts and jeans, but these are now somewhat of the "feminine" kind (read better-fitting). I wear a minimal amount of jewelry, and I keep my hair more loosely tied now, so that some of the neatness has been sacrificed. I do some minimal amount of the grooming part, with the emphasis on neatness. I still don't wear makeup or giggle, though I laugh a lot. I don't roam around with a pack of girls talking about boys or movies. I don't know if I have yet developed "girly" behaviour or not. 

But, it seems this was enough to change that tag! I thought being feminine meant having or displaying qualities that are unique to one as a female; that means you get those qualities only if you are a female. Nothing has changed in my essential mind or body in the past ten years, and yet, a simple change of clothes and elimination of acne seems to have changed the tag. Is that all femininity is about? The clothes and the hair and the makeup? If so, it isn't exactly a very useful or practical thing, is it? And if it has no use, why in the universe would I go to the trouble of developing that feminine quality in the first place! How presumptuous indeed to imply, that an essential part of my worth comes from such superficial things!

The other aspect is that being feminine apparently requires certain social attitudes as well. But in a way, this seems to be trampling on the ground of feminism, insofar as that is used to view certain social mores and norms. For example, I can cross a busy street in India without getting killed, and I'm quite skilled at that. Crossing the road alone is not a problem for me, and neither is it for hundreds of girls in India. Yet, if I happen to cross the road, or even walk by the side of the road with a guy, he will invariably move between me and the oncoming traffic. This is regardless of how much the guy knows or doesn't know me. Of course, he has been taught by his seniors and his peers that this is how you must treat a female, so it doesn't matter if he's a friend or a stranger; he will still walk on the side where the traffic is. 

Now I can complain about this, protesting that it is really unnecessary and I am quite capable of crossing the road facing the traffic myself, thank you very much: this is the feminist in me speaking. Or I can quietly accept it, because part of the "feminine" social deal is that it's okay to let a guy care for you any way he can; that in fact, it's supposed to be that way, that it's a guy's duty to take care of any female he's with. What makes it funny, apart from complicating matters, is that when a female refuses a male's "protection" or "care" in this manner, she actually affronts his "masculinity" (read male ego)! Whenever I protest against any guy trying to keep me away from the traffic, even on the safest and most orderly of roads, they physically pull me to the other side, saying things like, "You won't understand! Just come to the other side!" Those who don't or won't go so far as that, give me a look that combines surprise with a shade of being offended.

There are plenty of things like this, that a guy would do trying to be chivalrous: picking up bags, extending a hand over difficult terrain, opening doors, holding out chairs and so on. I find it rather strange; I don't need anyone, guy or girl, to do things like that for me. Yet tons of girls accept such behaviour, and indeed expect it from guys. So, is this attitude also part of being "feminine"? I've never seen a girl pull out a chair for a guy. Ever.

Surely, being feminine must be more than dressing yourself up or acting like a wimp? I still wonder.

New World

A new world is mine to make my own. And yet, life is no different in this world than it was in the old one.

How does it matter which side of the road you walk on? You still have to walk. 

How does it matter what time of day or night you walk? It's still unsafe to walk alone. 

How does it matter who you meet and talk to and roam about with? You still need friends, and you will find them wherever you go. 

How does it matter, who cooks best and who cooks worst, or indeed, who cooks at all? You still have to eat food to live. And to eat that food, you have to cook it the best you can. 

How does it matter how many people in the city you talk to? Girls will be girls, and boy will be boys. And girls and boys will always have the same issues around them and between them, that they always did. 

How does it matter how you try to disguise yourself? Your heart is always the same, still beating strong within you, with the rhythm that you have learnt and developed over so many years. 

How does it matter which song you listen to? Music is universal, it speaks to the mind in a language that does not have words or alphabets. 

How does it matter how many stories you hear? There will always be stories, and each brings out a new and fresh aspect of human nature you never knew existed before. And you will have your stories to tell and reveal too. 

How does it matter how far away a friend or a parent or a lover may be? You send them your love every time you think of them.

And how does it matter how far your goal is? In your dreams, you still see that which is most precious to you, that which is most priceless, that which you desire to have and cherish so passionately that when you awaken, nothing will stop you on your journey as you step towards it. 

At the end of the day, when your mind is exhausted and your heart begins to have misgivings, your sleep will rejuvenate you, invigorate you, and cheer you and offer you solace, so that you may continue with the next leg of your journey on the morrow. 

This new world is then, already my own.

Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?

This seems to be the smartest program on TV just about now. I knew there was a reason why I stopped watching TV except for Looney Tunes and Tom & Jerry.

The contestants are equally smart. I'll tell you the story of a contestant who got knocked out in just three questions, having used a cheat on each one of them.

Question 1: How many consonants are there in the word "Vowel"?

Question 2: True or False? "Vincent van Gogh was born in France."

Question 3: How many demonstrative adjectives are there in the following sentence? "That scruffy dog chased the multicoloured cat up the tall fence."

Now, I'm guessing that most people would score on the first one without skipping a beat. Our smart young lady chose to save herself instantly. Her idea was, there are two consonants in the spelling of "Voul". She learnt the correct spelling on the show.

Not many of us really know where Vincent van Gogh was born, but I think the name is at least a sufficient indication that the guy is a Dutchman, and not French.

Not too many people would remember third standard English grammar, which happens to be 5th standard English grammar for the Americans, but a demonstrative adjective is one which points towards a noun, rather than qualitatively defining it. There are only four in the entire English language: This, That, These, Those. No prizes for guessing the answer on this one.

This is the state of the language, amongst the people who are supposed to be the experts in it. And I, though living where I do and promoting the standard of language that I do, am still forced to shell out 8000 in cash, to pay for a test to prove my proficiency in the same language. And no hope for a reprieve. The little consolation I have is in watching the show, and gloating that I am smarter than an American 5th grader, and definitely much smarter than an average American of my age.

Bonny, and Blithe, and Good, and Gay

So India finally had its first major step in bringing homosexuals back to the community - decriminalizing their existence.

That was a pretty harsh step - condemning gayness to the point where it was actually a crime. It was an archaic and idiotic law at that time, and it is even more so today. Imagine the horror of having your existence labelled a crime, and for something that's actually a personal matter - the matter of who you fall in love with.

People who have opposed homosexuality usually have one of four particular reasons to oppose it: either that it is not permitted by religion, or that it could have adverse consequences for society (in terms of demographics), or that it involves 'unnatural' thinking or behaviour, or that it would lead to higher rates of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) amongst the existing population.

I find all these reasons weird.

The argument of religion is perhaps the most ridiculous. The idea of religion determining the validity of one's sexual orientation is most horrendous, for all the good reasons that atheists proclaim aloud all the time. It is rather alarming, to find that your entire social and moral structure is dictated by a belief system, which rather than being all-encompassing and tolerant, instead preaches the "righteousness" of only one set group of attributes in people, and condemns the rest. I would not, for one minute, accept any religion that effectively said that a certain denomination of people must be discriminated against; neither would I accept the preachings or claims of any so-called spiritual or religious or moral teacher who said so. If there is a divine being which created everything, then homosexuals were created by that same being, hence there is no call to treat them lesser than heterosexuals. If there never was any divine being, it doesn't change things, because everyone is still born with the rights of equality and freedom.

Another common argument is the fact that homosexuality could lead to a "breakdown in the fabric of society". What kind of breakdown are these people talking about? Any child which is raised in the home of a loving, honest, upright, caring family is likely to imbibe those attributes as well. How does it matter whether that family is two men, or two women, or a man and a woman? A child needs a safe, happy home to live in. A large number of children come from different kinds of families. There are children who have lost one parent, children who have lost both parents, children who have divorced parents, children who have been adopted, by either single parents or couples, children who have been adopted alongside natural children, children who have step-parents and step-siblings, resulting from extension of a few of the situations above, and so on. Even with the differing conditions, these children can be happy, if they have a happy and loving home atmosphere. Why should children with homosexual parents be any different?

One more objection is that homosexual tendencies are "unnatural". This sentiment reeks of bigotry. If someone is different, either actively or passively, that does not mean that they are criminals. If you think someone is unnatural for not thinking or acting the way you do, that means the other person has the right to think the same way about you. Sexual orientation is moreover, a private matter, that has no direct bearing on anyone except each individual for himself/herself. There is no call for anyone to go about labelling anyone else's sexual bent "unnatural".

Some people use the unnatural tag with the argument that children can be born naturally only to a man and a woman together, thus it is unnatural for any other liaison to exist. But how does it matter? Gay couples can always adopt children, apart from using one partner's sperm with donated ova, together with help from a surrogate mother. Lesbian couples have an added advantage in only needing the sperm, since either partner can herself become a mother. Infertility treatments allow for the conception of children by couples who couldn't normally have them. Isn't that going against the "law of nature"? But nobody in their senses would oppose the use of such treatments to have children, so how does this particular argument justify going against homosexuality?

The last problem - the one of spread of STDs - is a legitimate concern. But again, there are no grounds for condemning homosexuality, because the latter is not the only reason for spread of STDs. Unsafe sexual practices are followed by hundreds of people, heterosexual or not, often unknowingly. Those who know, often don't care until it's too late. Open any personal column or sex advice column in any magazine, and you will read plenty of cases about boys who visit prostitutes to "check their virility", about people who indulge in unprotected sex with partners and later realize that they know nothing about their partner's sexual habits or history, and about people who don't even understand the concept of protection, either against pregnancy or against STDs, much less know any level of detail about how various forms of protection work.

A lot of people don't know that there are STDs apart from AIDS, and many people live under the delusion that AIDS spreads mainly (or only) due to homosexual contact. Thanks to this state of affairs, and the equally dismal level of basic sexual education in the country, STDs are spreading at exponential levels, and instead of fostering sexual education and promoting safe practices and preventive procedures, people are instead attacking homosexuality as the cause.

Some basic sex education needs to be provided to teenagers at the right stages of life. After all, would it not be much better to arm adolescents with correct information and equip them to make good choices, rather than let them find out a whole motley bunch of mistruths on their own? Sex education is a separate issue on its own. People would rather not have any sex ed given to their children, for fear of encouraging experimentation in "evil practices" (of which they consider homosexuality is one). Unfortunately, in an age when information of every kind, true and untrue, is available at one's fingertips, unless active steps are taken to combat misinformation, things are likely to go down the drain.

And meanwhile, the issue of homosexuality stands on its own. Some progress is apparently being made in recent years; some homosexual marriages have been solemnized, by religious priests, and the parents of those couples have been accepting of the situation. There may be many more couples in nooks and corners in the country, quietly living their lives, keeping their secret. With at least their existence now no longer criminal in the eyes of the law, there may now come about a slow social revolution, culminating in a fairer quality of life for a significant part of the human populace.

Read A Book Daily...

I'm a condemned person for some time now. I'm about to jump off a precipice and find out whether all the effort I've put into designing and building my wings is going to work, because now I have to fly...

But there's still time to jump off that precipice. I have to find a landowner who's willing to let me use his property for my take-off.

And in the meanwhile I've to wait. So what do I do?

I read a book daily.

I've harboured this idea for a long time - I want my own library. A huge cupboard full of books, all neatly categorized, covered with good newspaper to protect the delicate covers from scratches and brutal treatment, and looking beautiful and inviting. I go crazy every time I go to a bookstore. I can't resist the temptation to buy just one more book, one more beautiful piece of writing, and my heart breaks every time I see the prices. I often soothe that wound by buying a Penguin classic that I don't already have - it's a bargain, seriously. You get a nice classic for just around one hundred rupees, and it's a good book to add to the collection. Penguin has its own taste in selecting books to publish, and it's taste matches with my own, and the best part is, my taste isn't confined to just one type of literature.

And now there's a new form of entertainment. It's called thin-slicing, the concept for which you should thank this young man. You get to read the first chapter of a book totally free, and from that, you must thin-slice and make out whether you'd like to buy the book or not. It's a great way to find out about books. And it makes for great recreation too.

Heh heh, you can let your imagination soar about the chapters you read too.

I've decided to read a book daily. Not just the actual paper that I can clasp in my hands, hold up to my face and smell deeply, write my name on and declare my ownership of, but also a trial run for all these new books by all these various authors, which I might probably not even see in my local bookstore.

It's probably also good to have a way to evaluate the books without the danger of falling to the temptation to buy them, which is likely to happen in an actual bookstore.

I can't help it, the atmosphere is just too tempting!

Colourblind

"Don't try to understand bureaucratic logic. Trust me, you don't want to," said my wise friend Marcus Licinius Crassus. He told me the following story.

A steel company in a small central-eastern state in my country, once wished to set up mining operations there. They penned a letter and sent it to the Department of Administrative Affairs to seek the required permissions. The Department flipped the moment they received the letter. Reason? It was in green ink.

"Oh no, our department correspondence and work is carried out only in red and black ink," said they, and so the forwarded the application for a second opinion to the Ministry of Interior Affairs. And those guys flipped out too. Reason? "Green ink is used only by the top guys in the military."

So they forwarded the application to the Ministry of Defence. And again, those guys flipped out! Reason? "This is nothing to do with us or our department! It must go back where it came from!"

And so the application found it's way back, over the course of eight months, back to the Ministry of Interior Affairs, which sent it back to the Department of Administrative Affairs, which sent it back to the steel company, stating that the application needed to be in line with the law passed two months back, stating that all applications and forms must henceforth always be penned in blue or black ink.

I don't know about the steel company, but Reynolds, Add and Cello must have made a fortune in blue and black ink since then.

Warning: True story. Oops, you already read it. :D

Viva la Project!

What have you done in this project?
Nothing, really.

Why do we need hybrid systems?
Environment friendly, you big bad smoking chimney!

Why do we combine solar power with wind power in a hybrid system, of all the renewable sources we can use?
Reminds me of the beach. Soak in the sun, with a cool breeze flowing... Gets me started, man!

What have you done in one year?
Watched movies, went on a trip, drank chai, got drunk, ate lots of nice food, celebrated my birthday, what more do you want to know, you sneak!

What is the efficiency of solar system/wind system?
Should be good, else we wouldn't use it.

What have you actually simulated?
How the thing works, you doof. Why not just read the damn report?

Why have you used voltage signals in the simulation, when a power system deals with load?
Coz that's what's possible in the goddamn software! Man, talk about being a prof...

Why have you chosen LabVIEW instead of Matlab?
Coz that's what my guide told me to do. Plus, it has a nice view... isn't that what it's supposed to be? Lab-View?

What are the voltage ranges we can deal with in this hybrid system, ie what is the load you can supply?
Whatever load you want, you build a big enough machine, and it'll supply. Talk to Homepower.org, they deal in installation info.

What is the use of your project?
Getting a grade so I can get out of here. Also perhaps some kid could copy it and get a grade too.

What machine is used in a wind turbine system?
The one that's used in all of them.

How can you increase the efficiency or power output of a hybrid system?
Umm... throw out the garbage on time? So that the system doesn't have to waste time doing it.

How cost-effective is a hybrid system?
Not much. I spent all my time and energy on this one, and that other idiot spent only 10 grand on his... and got a better grade! Talk about unfair!

Animal Tales

I know a dog, a black Labrador, owned by a friend of mine. He is huge and fat, being very well cared for, and also lazy, except when it comes to visitors to my friend's home. If you love dogs, you'll probably fall in love with him the moment you see him, like I did, and you'll never have a peaceful moment during your visit, since the dog will simply try to jump on you and tear you up in his excitement. If you show the slightest sign of being scared, God bless you. This is a dog that likes to scare people for fun, and will capitalize handsomely on the slightest sign of fear that you show.

But there are other animals in our lives too, besides the pets of our friends. Most of us do not bother to think about them, simply because they don't really have a ground shattering effect on our lives.

This junior in college recently brought to me a little box, containing three little baby rats. They were almost newly born, not more than a week old, and could sniff around, though not one could open its eyes. The mother may have abandoned them, but my juniors didn't have the heart to. They even inquired at a vet's if there was any sort of protective vaccination available. Sadly there was none, but last I heard, they have been trying to devise effective ways of feeding the little babies.

Then there's this mother cat in my hostel, who moves around with two beautiful kittens that bear the same colouring that she does. Kittens are such tiny delicate creatures. Cats are known to be rather aloof: they don't like being petted the way dogs do. They don't trust humans too much either. I managed to touch the cat, but she was averse to it and showed it too. The kittens moved away entirely from my range of touch.

The kitten tale reminds me of the kitten on Borivali Station in Mumbai. Another little baby probably abandoned by its mother, or perhaps orphaned. Feeble and cold, it tried to warm itself by sitting between my legs. My friend and I realized that we could not possibly take the kitten back with us, since neither he nor I would be able to take care of it properly. We tried to feed it, and it responded by climbing up into my lap on its own.

On a jog one cold morning in October, another friend and I found a litter of five pups lying bang in the middle of the road with no mother. It's common enough for the mother to give birth just about anywhere, though she does try to find a warm place which could be safe too. Stray dogs die easily, because if they aren't poisoned by unscrupulous householders or crushed by speeding vehicles, they are killed in fights with other dogs. These pups weren't newborn, but they didn't land up in the middle of the road by accident and were shivering badly. We thought to shift them to the bushes by the side of the road, and perhaps get some kind of cloth to serve as a blanket. The puppies didn't object to being touched, but the wail set up by them on being picked up brought the mother out of the nearby bushes where she had been resting onto the road, barking angrily. That was unnerving, but still reassuring. All mothers are indeed fiercely protective of their young.

Another jogging trip brought us to another puppy, this time alone, with no mother or siblings in sight. Pups are never born alone, but always in a litter, and while growing they rarely move far from each other. This little one had strayed away quite a bit, and though shivering in the cold, was not weak. It was sniffing quietly, looking lost and sad. My friend and I were wiser this time, and only remained with it till it wandered off on its own. It didn't object outright to being touched, but I don't think it liked it either. Stray dogs seem to be born with a sort of instinctive fear of being touched by humans. They need to be taught to like the touch, as pet dogs do.

I am reminded of the time when a young neighbour of mine brought to me a baby squirrel that he had found. That one had fallen out of its hole or nest wherever that was, and the mother hadn't retrieved it yet. If left on the ground without protection, the baby was likely to be eaten by a larger animal such as a cat or dog, which was why my friend picked it up. Squirrels hate to be touched even more than cats do, and this one had to be held cunningly so that it couldn't escape. It did manage to free its head for a few seconds though, and neatly sank its front teeth into my hand. They have really sharp teeth, needed for cutting and breaking through the seeds, nuts and pods that they eat. I am a creature large enough to be able to bear the pain of a squirrel bite, but that was a moment to be treasured, being bitten by a squirrel.

This other time, a squirrel got lost in my house. It found its way in and couldn't get out. For three days my mother and I chased it all through the house from room to room, and finally managed to corner it behind a door. I would have liked to tame it and keep it as a pet, but my folks won't abide animals, so I received the honour of releasing it back into the domestic wild from whence it came.

There was also once a toad that jumped into the kitchen, and this one we trapped under a bucket and led out of the house. And there was also the occasion when a young sparrow found its way into our house. At night too, so it took an hour of chasing and constantly light switching to enable it to find its way to the open air outside. That didn't help completely either, because the best we were able to do was guide it to the room with the largest window. We had to trap it and then release it. It wasn't a full grown adult; it could be held easily with two fingers and a thumb. The beating of its heart was faster and harder than I'd ever felt in my own pulse.

There is this lady who sells roasted corn stalks in the evenings right outside the college gate. There is a dog that frequents her stall, though keeping a distance, hoping to salvage a few grains from discarded stalks once people finish eating. My friend and I fed it a few grains at first one evening, feeling sorry for it. It wouldn't come any closer than five feet to us, so we left the grains on the sidewalk a little bit away. It lapped up the grains hungrily, not leaving a single one. We couldn't help it. We tore out and gave the remaining grains from the stalk as well. Even the gift of food wouldn't encourage enough trust in the animal to come closer to us. We had to leave everything at a safe distance from ourselves to encourage him to eat it. The slightest extension of a hand would drive him away.

There are a few dogs that frequent the tea stalls outside college in the mornings. These dogs are often fed biscuits by the people who come to jog on the college grounds. I once expressed a desire to my friend, the owner of the black Labrador, to feed them too. "Do it," he said. "I assure you, you won't ever regret it."

The Bad Credit Hotel

The biggest news at the moment is how the United States market has crashed, how millions of people have been left homeless due to foreclosures, how so many investors have lost their life savings due to bad loans and bad debts, and how many companies have been taken over or filed for bankruptcy. Not just in the US of A, but the whole world as well.

Meanwhile, the blame for this comes down not just to head honchos for making irresponsible decisions, but to every individual on his own for fueling an existence based on virtual money that doesn't exist, including bad financial behaviour such as taking loans you can't possibly pay back, and paying using credit that you can't possibly fulfill.

No comments from me on the matter: I've been trying to read and understand the matter but I am not a financial expert of any kind. I don't understand all these complicated investment matters and new schemes that keep floating around; I'm of the old school. But I do understand a few basic things: Buy now, pay later is a scheme that leads inevitably towards ruin, one must never spend more than what one has in one's wallet, and there is absolutely no excuse for spending needlessly.

People will still indulge in credit schemes though: the temptation to be able to own something right now and pay for it leisurely is too difficult to resist for most humans. The United States Treasury Department brought out this little idea to teach people to respect the institution of credit and use it properly, to avoid ruin. I've played the game. It's a little boring, since I don't have the patience to read through all those pieces of advice, and besides the rules don't apply exactly to me, since I do not reside in the United States. But the idea is likable indeed.

Have a go. You've got nothing to lose.

Marble Dreams

When the high Creator decided to bestow stone on the planet, in its myriad shapes, textures, colours and forms, little did the Mighty One, or anyone else for that matter (if they existed) realize that one of the most fascinating stones would be that with the perfect shape, the smoothest texture, the purest white colour, the most dazzling form. A stone so highly prized people dreamt of having it as their floor, because nothing speaks of affluence so much as the ability to have the whitest stone below the feet, used for the basic purpose of a living surface, when so many people could not afford even cheap stone for it, and lived on a surface of mud.

Marble. A stone that fascinates. A stone that is fascinating, because though it is abundant, it is highly prized and highly sought after. Especially pure, white, blemish-free marble, of the variety that was used to create the Taj Mahal, is very highly desired. At least it is, by a older generation of people who defined class by the ability to walk on marble floors. People nowadays prefer tiles of various kinds; those are much easier to clean, and don't really get very dirty in the first place.

Marble is not a precious stone. Indeed, it is not so precious that humans would give it the kind of importance that rubies or diamonds have: the honour of being worn upon the human body has not been granted to marble. But marble is an expensive and beautiful stone for construction, and is in that field, treated like diamond. Temples, community halls and other places of public use and worship are created using marble, the outer facades and porches of huge mansions are made with marble. The average middle class houseowner doesn't use marble for his floor; there are cheaper and more convenient floors available. Thus comes the idea that anyone who uses marble for his floor must be rather affluent indeed, and must be enjoying the greatest of joys and comforts.

My left foot and my right eyeball. This very same marble is a pain in the neck for me, because my mother, subscribing to the same old school of thought, installed marble floors in her house, making it impossible for me to move about the house, whether it be my body or the furniture I work upon, for fear of damaging the beautiful white floor. I am under strict orders to never even contemplate shifting any furniture, which would inevitably involve running the risk of scratching the floor. I'm sick of this. I wish I could move normally. I wish I could move my table the way I like without having to worry about scratching the floor. I wish I didn't have to worry about spilling anything onto the floor (because if the marble gets stained there's no way to remove the stain). I wish I didn't have to deal with the extraordinary amount of fine dust that creeps into the marble and eats it away, if the marble is not cleaned everyday. I wish I didn't have to worry about accidentally using acidic cleaners to clean the floor (because if you mix acid with CaCO3, which is what marble is, you're going to get a salty residue that would be the permanent ruin of your expensive marble).

But all the same, you have to admit it: the marble is magnificent. There's nothing to match the feeling of beautiful, sparkling, cold white stone that feels like butter when you sit upon it, after you've given it a thorough scrubbing. You feel royal, you feel like the queen sitting upon her throne, only the throne is not just a chair that you sit on, but has extended to become the very floor you live on. And this is why the old school, brought up to live life at just the right pace - neither unbearably slow nor excruciatingly fast - who didn't need to worry about spilling stuff or dragging furniture, harboured visions of pure cold white stone - marble dreams.